No More!

A divorce is final and a wife who always left the finances up to her husband is now left to fend for herself financially.  A husband for thirty years suddenly passes away from a heart attack and his widow has no idea where to start to put her life back together financially because she always let him pay the bills and invest on their behalf.   Both of these women and both of these situations I know personally. Both of these situations happen too often and women are always on the losing end!  When I write it is usually to inform the reader about how to manage their money better so that in the future they will have wealth and not debt.  Rarely do I write about subjects that are intense in nature, but as Women's history month is upon us I feel that I need to address an important issue that is affecting 4 in 10 households in the United States. 

Women are the primary breadwinners in 4 out of 10 households in America which means it is more important than ever for women to know how to manage their finances. Not only for themselves, but also for the children they have or hope to have. Whether a woman is married or not she has to be in control of her money! Gone are the days where a husband or a father would handle the finances of a wife or daughter. Whenever this took place in the past, all it did was leave that women in a vulnerable position with her finances if that father or husband died. More commonly today women are finding themselves in a divorce and completely lost afterwards because they spent their entire marriage letting their husband control the bank account and other financial matters. 

Today all of that CHANGES!  No longer as women will we sit on the sideline and wish that our finances just fall into place.  We will take the necessary steps needed to control our own money and stop letting our money control us!  So what can we do? First, we decide what we want in life. What goals do we have for our household in the short term (6-12 months) the intermediate (1-3 years) and long-term (5-10 years). These goals which I like to call dreams are the fire to our match and they are going to get us to where we want to be financially. When my family was $48,000 in debt we created our own dreams and we wrote them down on a piece of paper and put it up on the refrigerator so that it could be seen each and every day. Believe it or not that sheet of paper full of our dreams kept us focused the 2 1/2 years it took to pay off all $48,000 because every time that we wanted to buy something we didn’t need we would look at that sheet and say we want that dream more!  After women figure out what they want in their life going forward it is now time to take your head out the sand and figure out if you are in debt and if you are how much debt you are in. The only way that you can begin to become debt-free is to know who you owe money to and how much you owe them. Only then can you take action to pay off that debt!

Getting a spending plan (budget) down on paper is essential because you have to know how much money is coming in and going out each month so that you can start to make the needed adjustments. If a woman finds herself living paycheck to paycheck each month she can start her financial recovery by looking at her spending plan and seeing what she can cut out. Cutting out unnecessary expenses leaves money available in each paycheck to start paying off debt. If after cutting out all that you can in unnecessary expenses you still find yourself struggling financially then it is time to find extra income to pay off debt. That may mean adding extra job or selling anything that you can for the extra money. When we were getting out of debt we sold everything that we could. If people wanted to buy it, we would sell it to them!  We also found out what we were good at which was tennis and basketball and started training kids in each sport for $25/ hour!  Do whatever it takes to find the extra money to pay off what you owe!

Why is it important for ALL women to be debt-free and use their money to work for them and not someone else? The reason is that women on average make $.77 for every $1 a man makes, so we can’t afford not to be in control of our money! Even with the income disadvantage women can still come out on top by controlling their finances.  The secret is to make it up in your mind that you deserve better and you are going to do whatever it takes to get to that better!  No more spending money on stuff you don’t need! No more staying in debt because society said “that is how it will always be!” No more not having an emergency fund!  No more letting someone else tell you what to do with your hard earned money!  Today is the day you say “NO MORE!” 

WHOLE NEW BALL GAME

Football and basketball season are in full gear!  A local football team Winston Salem State Rams just won the CIAA Championship and their basketball team as well as Wake Forests’ are hitting the hardwood running!  These players may be playing for college fans now, but some may be playing for fans in the professional arena in the near future.  Recently ESPN broadcasted its’ documentary “30 For 30 Broke” and it was about professional athletes who signed contracts for tens of millions of dollars and still ended up bankrupt and BROKE!  As I watched the documentary anger rose up in me, not because these athletes were wasting their money on toys, but because majority of the athletes had the money stolen from them by people they trusted.  I have known for years about millionaire athletes going broke such as Mike Tyson, Allen Iverson, Warren Sapp, Sheryl Swoops, etc but it wasn't until this documentary that it started to hit home.  The reason that it bothered me so much is that I know kids who could be in the same situation in a few years.  My husband has been coaching AAU (Amateur Athletic Union) boys’ basketball for six years now and the kids are seniors in high school.  Every one of these kids have signed to Division I schools for basketball and some of them have a real chance at making it to the NBA in a few years earning the same millions that these other athletes on this documentary lost.

Once the program was over I started to think that every other person watching probably was wondering to themselves “how could anyone lose millions of dollars?”  These athletes are just like everyone else who finds themselves in debt they just have more money to be in debt with.  People with hundreds or thousands of dollars are no different than these millionaire athletes when it comes to money management it is just to a different scale.  These athletes may have spent money buying new Bentleys, but the average middle class person is spending their money on a new BMW.  The millionaire athlete may have bought the mansion with the six extra bedrooms they didn't need, but the middle class homeowner is in the average household debt of $47,000 (credit cards, student loans, car loans, etc) and as a result they are falling behind on their mortgage, light bill, water bill, you name it and it is a late payment.  These athletes trusted the wrong accountants and financial advisors and all their money was misused or stolen, but the average middle class adult has purchased whole life insurance and their money is being misused just the same.

The problem is not the amount of money you make it is your behavior with that money (Financial Literacy) that gets you out of debt and creates generational wealth.  When we all learn that we don’t have to spend money we don’t have, buying stuff we don’t need to impress people we don’t like only then will wealth start to accumulate.  Majority of these athletes come from humble backgrounds so when they get these million dollar contracts they just sit back and let someone else handle their finances and it ends up costing them dearly.  Just like these athletes you have a salary that is much more than you had growing up and you have to be diligent on how you handle it or you could end up broke or worse just getting by for the rest of your life.  No one is going to care more about your finances than you will, so pay attention to what you spend and save whatever you can because only YOU can control your financial future!